Do you want this to be your legacy?

While it’s safe to say that no members of the Astor family will be taking away the Nobel Peace Prize (and congrats to President Obama) that’s not to say that we all haven’t been following the drama as it unfolds. Most of us are not in that financial stratosphere (and if you are, how about investing in this site?) but there are important lessons to be learned even if your estate consists of a minuscule savings account.

First, have a will. Surprisingly, in the survey we ran last month, of over 160 respondents, over a third of them didn’t have a will. The oldest group (70+), two out of three people did have a will, the third person hadn’t even started thinking of it. What are you waiting for? A free-for-all with your relatives and friends? A six month trial with endless appeals? In the age group 56-70 the majority had wills, but the numbers dropped significantly in the group 41-55 with only 54.7% having a will. This is a group that has children, but almost 25% of them didn’t have a will.
Even if you draft a basic document from one of the legal websites, like Legalzoom or go to Amazon.com for the Suze Orman’s Will & Trust Kit, it’s better than nothing at all, and no matter how much you may deny it, the thought of ________ getting their hands on your __________ should send you running to the lawyer.

Second, communicate with the people you care about. And communicate early. The more people who know what your wishes are, the less chance that your favorite Childe Hassam painting won’t disappear from over the sofa. Some people use the 40/70 rule for starting the conversation (meaning that when someone is either 40 or 70 start talking) but if you have children of any age, your estate should be in order to protect your children. And why would you want to make your passing any more painful for them by dying intestate (without a will)? On the CBS Moneywatch site there’s a great list of 12 tough questions to ask your parents, and don’t feel you have to limit it to your parents. You might want to go through the list yourself and make sure you have all these bases covered.  That’s what I did before I approached my parents.

I’ve learned from having these conversations with my parents that it’s REALLY tough to break the ice, but once it’s broken, you’ll be surprised at how easy it is to work on this, one step at a time. And isn’t a good night’s sleep, knowing everything is taken care of, better than the nightmare of endless legal wrangling? Let me know how you’ve done. The next time we do a survey, I want 99% to have a will, ok?

Tags: conversations, estate, family, legacy, power of attorney, will

This entry was posted on Monday, October 12th, 2009 at 6:08 am and is filed under aging, conversation, family, legacy, legal, memories, parents, will. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.