Archive for the ‘memories’ Category

What would you do for a raspberry blueberry pie? Secret family recipes.

Sunday, August 15th, 2010

Does your family have secret family recipes? Mine does. My mother’s secret recipe is for a raspberry blueberry pie. It’s powers are so strong that years ago an old friend of mine agreed to drive my parents’ cat from their house in Maine, back to Boston, in return for a pie of his own. Now I know you’re thinking that it sounds like a pretty sweet deal, pun intended, but the cat in question was not a good passenger. Not only would he howl for the entire four hour trip, he would manage to do so in between throwing up on whoever or whatever was in the back seat.

My grandmother, on my father’s side, was famous for the caramels she would make every year for Christmas. We couldn’t wait for the package to come from Michigan. There was always a small box with perfectly wrapped caramels full of buttery goodness. My parents would dole out the caramels day by day if we were good, until Christmas when the box usually was finished before dinner.My brother got the recipe from Grandma before she died.

The next time you get together with your family, remember the great recipes that are part of almost all our heritages. What’s your family’s heirloom recipe?

Don’t forget this week’s Blogging Boomers Carnival!

Lettuce Running Amok, Infidelity, THC, RV’s, It Must Be The Blogging Boomers Carnival!

Monday, July 26th, 2010

What do you think is the number one site used in divorce cases involving infidelity? What happens when lettuce runs amok? Where else could you find the answers to these and other burning issues for Boomers, but the Blogging Boomers Carnival? I’m hosting this week and invite you to check out and comment on:

  • Family law attorneys say the number one site most often used as evidence in divorce cases involving infidelity is Facebook. Read about it at LifeTwo.com.
  • Over at Contemporary Retirement, Ann reports on a new study that suggests that it’s friends, and not children or grandchildren, that could be the key to a happy retirement.
  • SoBabyBoomer tells us about two boomers, concerned with surviving their individual career challenges in a declining economy, visit the library to discuss how to proceed with their phased retirement.
  • As it turns out, the medicinal properties of THC found in cannabis or marijuana go far beyond soothing pain and nausea.  They may even cure cancer someday!  Learn more here.
  • A trip down Memory Lane with The Boomer Chronicles. My fab RV trip down South.
  • It used to be easy. Wear red shoes with a red purse. How things have changed! Get the scoop on the modern rules for co-ordinating your purse and shoes at Fabulous after 40.  
  • Vaboomer has a giant lettuce plant gone amok in her crazy garden.  Help!
  • Janet Wendy at Gen Plus has fallen in love all over again…with an Android.  The Droid X by Motorola, to be exact. 
  • And I’ve got another blog,the Accidental Locavore, check it out and see what I’m cooking and eating that’s local and fresh. This week’s farmbasket was loaded with tomatoes, corn, and lots of other goodies.

    Baby Boomers Take Note: A Wonderful Use For Your Flip Video

    Sunday, May 30th, 2010

    Most Baby Boomers have a video recorder. It may be an older video camera you bought for taking videos of the kids growing up, or a cool new Flip Video, but you know you’ve got one. After reading this you’re going to want to dust if off and recharge the batteries.

    For her mom’s 75th birthday, Ann Mehl had her filmmaker friend Mark McDevitt film her mother as she went around doing her daily tasks. Ho hum you’re thinking, right? Before you dismiss it as just another family video, check it out here on the NY Times site. Ann’s mother has dementia, and Ann has written several time for this blog, about her experiences caring for an elderly parent. Mark has captured her caregiving, and kindness as well as the wonderful spirit of Ann’s mother. Here are some ideas for video records for your own family and you don’t have to have a professional do them:

    • Practical: Shoot videos of each room in the house, focusing on valuables. Copy this video to a thumbdrive and move it to a secure place off-site in case of fire or theft. This way you’ll have a record for the insurance company.
    • Delicious: Is there a family recipe or cooking technique you’d like to know about? Sometimes a pinch of this, or the right texture for meatballs or pie crust is better filmed than on a aging recipe card.
    • Enthralling: What better way to have the family stories preserved, than by your family’s best story teller?
    • Timeless: Do you really look at your photos on the computer? Wouldn’t you rather see your family as they were at that moment in time? The NY Times piece said “If we want to remember the people they were at 75 or 85 or 93, why don’t we document their voices and smiles and stories using today’s simple, affordable technology?”
    • Creative: The Times article also pointed out that the younger members of the family may be the most adept with the technology, so why not let them have a shot at filmmaking?

    What other uses for a video camera can you think of for your family memories? Leave a comment. As a side note, because I was so touched by the 75th birthday video, I’ve been working with Mark on another project, and it’s been a great experience.

    Hike 4 Hope. Will you please support a great event?

    Monday, February 8th, 2010

    This week’s blog is about a great event, Hike 4 Hope (that unfortunately I cannot attend this year). My friend Leslie wrote this earlier this week, and I think it says it all. Please give what you can to our team.

    “My business partner, Eileen Stern, is an amazing can do woman.  Having lost 6 family members in a year (including her Mother) to cancer, she turned her tragedy into triumph by creating Hike 4 Hope, a fundraiser to fund women’s cancer research at City of Hope.   Twelve years later her grass roots idea has blossomed into an annual event & this year will host over 1000 participants hiking in the majestic Indian Canyons of Palm Springs.

    When it comes to fund-raising for City of Hope, I have no shame.  My commitment to COH is a personal one.  Given three months to live, I’m alive today because of COH’s collaboration, care & research/development of the drug Rituxan.  COH research has also led to the development of other leading anti-cancer drugs; Herceptin, Avastin and Erbitux, as well as synthetic human insulin –all of which are saving millions of lives worldwide.  Additionally COH has pioneered the use of TOMO Therapy (pin point radiation) & the DaVinci surgical system (prostate cancer).

    We are aware of an injured economy.  Unfortunately active cancer cells could care less.  Far too many of us know someone whose life has been impacted by this disease.  This year we’ve formed a team to hike in honor of our dear friend, Marcelle Freides, who is again battling breast cancer after a 5 year remission.  The great news is she is being co-treated at both St. John’s Hospital in Santa Monica & City of Hope.

    This Valentines Day marks 4 years since my initial cancer diagnoses and a day of sharing gifts from the heart.  Please open your heart and support me by joining Marcelle’s Mighty Marchers through the link.  Your gift of hope will help benefit all the mothers, daughters, friends, and loved ones who deal with the shock of a cancer diagnosis every minute.”

    And please don’t forget to check out this week’s Blogging Boomers Carnival.

    2009: the year in review. The top 3 most commented on blogs.

    Monday, December 28th, 2009

    In the spirit of year end reviews, best of lists, and taking a break before conquering 2010, here are the top three most commented blogs from 2009. Which was your favorite?

    From June 1st: What would you do for a raspberry blueberry pie? Secret family recipes.

    What would you do for a pie?

    Does your family have secret family recipes? Mine does. My mother’s secret recipe is for a raspberry blueberry pie. It’s powers are so strong that years ago an old friend of mine agreed to drive my parents’ cat from their house in Maine, back to Boston, in return for a pie of his own. Click here to read the rest of the blog.

    From Ann Mehl on March 30th: Living and dealing with Alzheimer’s: Ann’s story and life lessons learned

    My mom suffers from dementia. She’s all mixed up and she knows it. Since my father passed away over four years ago, I’ve watched my mother slip deeper and deeper into a shadowy fog of memory loss. The most difficult part is watching her observe the changes in herself. “I just don’t know what’s happening to me. I used to be so on top of things,” she will often lament. Click here for more.

    And the most commented on, from June 8th: What’s the number one thing you’d miss from your handbag? Or can I survive a week without Blackberry, Amex?

    It's All About Aging peonysThis was going to be a totally different topic today, but I thought I’d stray to what’s really on my mind. Because I can, you know.

    Last night I filled up the car to come back to the city with giant containers of stuff from Costco, a big bunch of peonies from my garden (probably the last for the season), and the usual stuff that commutes from the city to the country. What was left behind, was my purse, and all its contents. Click here for more, and all the comments.

    Have a happy & healthy new year! What are the topics you’d like to see covered in 2010?

    How to Marry an Internet Serial Killer: Throw a Surprise Wedding

    Friday, November 20th, 2009

    I was never one of those women who pictured herself in a big white gown, walking down the aisle. For me it was more about getting married in Las Vegas by an Elvis impersonator on the Strip and having a great party in New York afterward.

    When Frank and I decided to get married, my only stipulation was that my mother didn’t know about it. If that sounds harsh, understand the women on my mother’s side of the family tend to be a little obsessive. To compound that, my mother and my aunt are twins, my aunt lives in Manhattan, and used to be one of the famous fact checkers at the New Yorker. If the twins knew about the wedding, it would be endless obsession over food, drink, napkins, guests… everything.

    It's All About Aging WeddingAs we usually host Thanksgiving, the plan was to get married the next afternoon. A justice of the peace was found who would come to our country house and perform the ceremony. We told everyone he was an architect coming to look at the house, and he was great about playing along.

    On Friday afternoon, a few friends and family were up at our house eating turkey sandwiches, hanging out in their slippers. My best friend/maid of honor, and I were frantically trying to put the Martha Stewart touch to a bunch of lily of the valley. When the justice of the peace showed up, I came down the stairs in an off white cashmere turtleneck and velvet skirt and said “I know you thought we were going to announce our engagement tonight, and we still might, but right now we’re getting married”. Supposedly the look on my father’s face was amazing, and I’m sorry I missed it.

    After the brief ceremony, we had champagne and cake, and went off to a celebratory dinner at the Beekman Tavern in Rhinebeck. My mother was thrilled, and as it turned out, grateful that she didn’t have to do anything but enjoy herself.

    Three weeks later, we had the big party at our apartment in Manhattan, surrounded by friends and family. The highlight of the party was an amazing wedding cake made by two of my friends out of two hundred Tastykakes (Frank is from Philly). It's All About Aging Tastykakes

    And for the past eleven years, we’ve lived happily ever after, always celebrating our anniversary on the Friday after Thanksgiving. Love you sporto!

    Don’t forget to check out this week’s Blogging Boomers Carnival, and have a Happy Thanksgiving!

    Avoid Your Own Astor Disaster or Where There’s A Will…

    Monday, October 12th, 2009
    Do you want this to be your legacy?

    Do you want this to be your legacy?

    While it’s safe to say that no members of the Astor family will be taking away the Nobel Peace Prize (and congrats to President Obama) that’s not to say that we all haven’t been following the drama as it unfolds. Most of us are not in that financial stratosphere (and if you are, how about investing in this site?) but there are important lessons to be learned even if your estate consists of a minuscule savings account.

    First, have a will. Surprisingly, in the survey we ran last month, of over 160 respondents, over a third of them didn’t have a will. The oldest group (70+), two out of three people did have a will, the third person hadn’t even started thinking of it. What are you waiting for? A free-for-all with your relatives and friends? A six month trial with endless appeals? In the age group 56-70 the majority had wills, but the numbers dropped significantly in the group 41-55 with only 54.7% having a will. This is a group that has children, but almost 25% of them didn’t have a will.
    Even if you draft a basic document from one of the legal websites, like Legalzoom or go to Amazon.com for the Suze Orman’s Will & Trust Kit, it’s better than nothing at all, and no matter how much you may deny it, the thought of ________ getting their hands on your __________ should send you running to the lawyer.

    Second, communicate with the people you care about. And communicate early. The more people who know what your wishes are, the less chance that your favorite Childe Hassam painting won’t disappear from over the sofa. Some people use the 40/70 rule for starting the conversation (meaning that when someone is either 40 or 70 start talking) but if you have children of any age, your estate should be in order to protect your children. And why would you want to make your passing any more painful for them by dying intestate (without a will)? On the CBS Moneywatch site there’s a great list of 12 tough questions to ask your parents, and don’t feel you have to limit it to your parents. You might want to go through the list yourself and make sure you have all these bases covered.  That’s what I did before I approached my parents.

    I’ve learned from having these conversations with my parents that it’s REALLY tough to break the ice, but once it’s broken, you’ll be surprised at how easy it is to work on this, one step at a time. And isn’t a good night’s sleep, knowing everything is taken care of, better than the nightmare of endless legal wrangling? Let me know how you’ve done. The next time we do a survey, I want 99% to have a will, ok?

    Internet Serial Killer, or How I Met My Husband. There is Hope After 40.

    Monday, October 5th, 2009

    Last week, a conversation with Sabina Ptacin, genius PR maven at Collective-e, and her own company Red Branch Public Relations, turned to the subject, as it so often does, of finding men in New York. She was telling me about someone she knew who was convinced that it was impossible to find love in New York once you’re “over the hill”. “I met my husband when I was in my 40′s” I said, “on the Internet”. After a dead silence on the other end of the phone, Sabina said it would be a great blog, so here goes.

    About a dozen years ago, I was home recovering from some surgery, bored to death with daytime TV, and I decided to surf the net for personals. On a site, possibly webpersonals, was a picture of a man that really appealed to me. His

    Does this look like an Internet serial killer to you?

    Does this look like an Internet serial killer to you?

    profile had the top ten things he was looking for in a woman (something he got a lot of grief about), and a bonus question…you had to like France and the French. Well, I won a scholarship to the Chamber Syndicale de la Haute Couture, and lived in Paris for a year after college, so that one was easy. The rest were along the lines of  you have to be smart, politically aware, like sex, and be tall. According to Frank, my husband, my best answer was to the tall question. “I’m 5’4″ but I have an extensive collection of 3″ heels, and I love tall men.

    We e-mailed for about a month, and one day he sent me an e-mail that said “My friends say I’m working too hard, and turning into a dull guy. Do you have any advice?”. I screwed up all my courage, and typed back “why don’t you take a good looking blond out and buy her a drink?”. We met later that week, and hit it off completely. I would have invited him back to my place, but my brother was convinced he was an Internet serial killer (something he completely denies now), so that waited until the next date. We got married a year later, in a surprise wedding, and have lived happily ever after for 11 years now. Let me know if you’d like to know how to throw a surprise wedding, and I’ll put it in another blog.

    Oh, and the weird part, although he says his picture was on the site for a long time, as one of their success stories, I could never find it again…ever.

    Would You Save Your DNA in a Swiss Account?

    Monday, September 28th, 2009

    Shades of Jurassic Park…

    Which is the key to your DNA?

    Which is the key to your DNA?

    There’s a new service that  allows you to save your DNA in a Swiss vault along with all your memories. It’s the Swiss DNA Bank, and it allows you to “Preserve yourself in Switzerland, the world’s safest place to be. Forever”. The premise is that you’re doing future generations a favor. This is from the site:

    • Preserve a fresh memory of you after life. Your loved ones will never forget about you.
    • Don’t waste your experiences, good or bad, but rather pass them on to help build a better world.
    • You never know what science will be able to do with your DNA in the future.

    Here’s the cynic’s take on this: haven’t you always wondered what it’s like for the families of famous people, like say, Jerry Orbach, to see their dearly departed re-run on TNT’s Law & Order, all night long? On the plus side, there are residuals, but what’s it like to be immortal on film? Do you want to be able to pull up the dead on the Internet ? Facebook resurrection pages?

    And shouldn’t you pass your experiences on, good or bad, while you’re still here? What good is it sitting in a Swiss vault, gathering dust (do they have dust in Switzerland?)? Unlike wine, does experience get better with age? Is a gigabyte enough or do you upgrade to 4GB (the size of my iPod nano) for an additional $299?

    Finally, for those of you who don’t remember Jurassic Park, they recreated dinosaurs from the DNA in a mosquito preserved in amber, and it didn’t turn out well. According to Wikipedia: “Often considered a cautionary tale on unconsidered biological tinkering in the same spirit as Mary Shelley‘s Frankenstein…”

    While it’s interesting to think about being recreated and coming back sometime in the future, what do you come back as? Yourself at the age you parked the DNA? A clone? An infant (who would raise you)? Some nasty warrior thing wrecking havoc on planet Earth? OK, so I’ve seen one too many bad disaster films.

    Seriously though, would you spend $399 to park yourself in a Swiss vault?

    Golf and Alzheimer’s, another good reason for putting all the bad shots behind you.

    Monday, April 27th, 2009

    It's All About Aging  golfers silhouetted If you’re a golfer, you know all the frustrations inherent with the game. That awful tee shot, the rimmed putt, and then, the shot that brings you back every time (mine was on 13 yesterday), but would you ever think it was therapeutic? And for Alzheimer’s patients? Hardly likely!

    Well, a group in California found that Alzheimer’s patients who had previously played the game, retained the muscle memory, and were able to find pleasure, once again,  chasing after a dimpled white ball. The article in the Wall Street Journal focused on the pleasure derived from doing “an activity that once brought about true pleasure” and found “the agitation can dissipate, their minds can clear, and memories related to that activity can return.”

    So the next time you find yourself cursing over that chunked shot, know that it truly is history, and when your memory fades, it will always be the good shots that bring you back.